By Jeannine Gage

Staff writer

NEW SMYRNA BEACH - Growing up in a family of nurses, nurturing comes naturally for Magean Ward. She has helped her mom, siblings, friends, and most especially her children through rough times. But when it was she who needed some nurturing and support, she found she couldn't provide it for herself.

An abusive relationship with a man who couldn't keep a job landed her in a safe house while still a teenager and pregnant. Once reestablished in New Smyrna Beach and with a second child, she tried but failed to stay in school so she too could become a nurse.

"I held on to school as long as I could," she said, "But I just couldn't do it anymore."

Ms. Ward, 24, who tried the best she could to improve her lot, is just the type of person that a local organization, Our Family, wants to help. Just over a year old, Our Family was started by a group of concerned residents who felt there must be a better way to help impoverished residents than just paying a month's rent or buying them some groceries.

"Emergency help is necessary," said one of Our Family's founders Harvey Kissel. "But it's a band-aid. There's more to it than that."

So Mr. Kissel, his wife, Kathy, and some of their friends from Our Lady Star of the Sea Catholic Church decided to create a plan to get people off emergency assistance and help them help themselves.

"We stopped writing checks and started working with people on a long-term basis instead," Mr. Kissel, a retired management consultant, said.

For Ms. Ward, this meant not just help with rent and car payments, but encouragement to go back to school and childcare so she could study.

"Everybody needs help sometimes," Ms. Ward said. "I'm not ashamed I needed it."

The group also offers a shoulder to cry on or someone to vent to when needed.

"We like to think we offer a functional family for some people who have come from dysfunctional families," Mr. Kissel said. "We want them to know they can trust us and that we believe in them."

Unlike many of the local organizations that offer assistance to those in need, there are requirements and rules for those who get help from Our Family.

"We give them assignments," Our Family President Regis Sloan said. "We want them to show us that they want to help themselves."

This means working, going to school or otherwise trying to make it on their own.

Ms. Ward said she did whatever was needed to work with Our Family.

"Oh my gosh, I was happy to do whatever they wanted me to do," she said. "It has helped me so much. I'm more organized and independent."

Ms. Ward is one of about 26 clients Our Family has helped in the past year. Most people are referred to them from other social services agencies. For now, the organization works out of the Kissels' home and exists on private donations. The group had a budget of $37,000 last year.

"We hope to grow and open an office eventually," Mr. Kissel said. "We want to help as may people as we can."

A similar group, called Family Promise of Southeast Volusia County, is working to establish services locally. It is part of a national organization that provides shelter, family mentoring and community initiatives to help prevent poverty and homelessness.

Ms. Ward recently achieved her lifelong dream. She graduated from the Daytona Beach Community College Nursing program and is working as a licensed practical nurse at a local nursing home.

"I love it," she said. "It feels like I should have been doing this my whole life."

And even though things are looking up for Ms. Ward and her two children, Our Family is still a big part of her life.

"We want our services to be finite so at some point they are completely on their own," Ms. Sloan said. "But we also don't want to leave them too soon."

As far as Ms. Ward is concerned, she hopes that day will never come. She plans to give back to Our Family by helping with new clients. And that's just what Mr. Kissel and Ms. Sloan hoped would happen.

"Our feeling is if you help one family, they'll help another family," Mr. Kissel said. "And that helps the entire community."

For more information on Our Family, visit www.ourfamilyflorida.com. For more information on Family Promise, visit www.familypromise.org.